They eventually left utopia and headed back out to sea bound for Mahon, Menorca. At 00:39 hrs The Kipper wrote:
'Now back on watch until 0400. On our way to Mahon we should be there early afternoon. Need to refill water and do a shop.'
By 13:34 hrs they had arrived and it was reported to be very hot and sunny. Showers were apparently called for and needed.
By 18:26 hrs, discussions were underway about the next few days. Steve was in favour of waiting till Sunday in the anchorage but Little Bobbie D needs to move on because he has to get home. There is little wind forecast for the next few days so that would mean motoring and they have been doing a lot of that. It's proving to be expensive and boring but it is progress. The Kipper is frustrated by the weather and their slow progress. They decided to leave the next morning for Sardinia.
The Kipper says that he has been looking at their options - parking the boat up somewhere near Mahon just isn't an option because it would be hugely expensive. They are about 4 days behind schedule which isn't bad given the tough time they had getting down to Gibraltar. I can fully understand Bobbie D's wanting to get home - I expect lovely Julie has worn furrows in the harbour wall waiting for him and it'll be blinkin hot wearing that Scottish Widows cloak in the height of summer. Also, I think the dogs might need a walk!! Steve on the other hand is one of those extremely lucky devils who is retired and living the dream so where's the hurry. I will of course remind The Kipper that he has a job of work to come back to (wouldn't want him to forget!).
I'm afraid I very selfishly want The Kipper and the crew-of-two to finish this trip together so hopefully, the wind will sort itself out, they'll get some decent sailing in and make excellent progress towards their final destination.
Thursday, 2 August 2012
Monday 30th July 12
I received the following update from The Kipper at silly-o-clock; I'm guessing that it was sent yesterday:
'Hi, you won't get this for a while but at 17:38 hrs today we crossed the Greenwich Meridian and are back in the east. First time since 22/5/12 and 2100 miles!! Been talking today; our destination appears so much closer and achievable. Excitment is slowly building. When you get this, we will have arrived and anchored in an island off Formenterra called Espalmadore'.
Now everyone, cast your minds back to the planning meetings held way back at the beginning of the year during which Formenterra was mentioned and made Steve's eyes glaze over at the thought of all those scantily clad if not naked beauties who frequent this area of the Med. The Kipper barely managed to conceal his excitement at the thought of visiting this utopia and Little Bobbie D adopted a devil-may-care attitude as lovely Julie was sitting within striking distance.
Well, it seems they've arrived in the area. The Scribe did manage to glean a little bit of sailing information from them before hysteria set in:
'I'm afraid no sailing, had 8 knots true wind on the nose. It did pick up to 10-11 for an hour when we got the headsail out but nothing more. Going to stay here in the anchorage and chill for the day, then onto Majorca, Porto Column (?) for the night, then Mahon on Menorca, refuel, water and supplies. Thursday/Friday to Sardinia. That's the plan It's very pretty here but full of yachts!! All things being equal may be in Vlyho Greece by the weekend after next. I hope I haven't put the mockers on it. Fancy meeting us on the quay to wecome us back?'
Oh how The Scribe would very much like to be on the dockside to catch their lines and offer them a chilled beer and hearty congratulations. Sadly, it is not to be - despite The Kipper's best efforts to convince her.
At 08:30 hrs, this arrived...
With the caption....'He had to do it, no trunks!!'
Entitled, 'Sitting in the cockpit with a sundowner waiting for Little Bobbie D to cook dinner'
'Hi, you won't get this for a while but at 17:38 hrs today we crossed the Greenwich Meridian and are back in the east. First time since 22/5/12 and 2100 miles!! Been talking today; our destination appears so much closer and achievable. Excitment is slowly building. When you get this, we will have arrived and anchored in an island off Formenterra called Espalmadore'.
Now everyone, cast your minds back to the planning meetings held way back at the beginning of the year during which Formenterra was mentioned and made Steve's eyes glaze over at the thought of all those scantily clad if not naked beauties who frequent this area of the Med. The Kipper barely managed to conceal his excitement at the thought of visiting this utopia and Little Bobbie D adopted a devil-may-care attitude as lovely Julie was sitting within striking distance.
Well, it seems they've arrived in the area. The Scribe did manage to glean a little bit of sailing information from them before hysteria set in:
'I'm afraid no sailing, had 8 knots true wind on the nose. It did pick up to 10-11 for an hour when we got the headsail out but nothing more. Going to stay here in the anchorage and chill for the day, then onto Majorca, Porto Column (?) for the night, then Mahon on Menorca, refuel, water and supplies. Thursday/Friday to Sardinia. That's the plan It's very pretty here but full of yachts!! All things being equal may be in Vlyho Greece by the weekend after next. I hope I haven't put the mockers on it. Fancy meeting us on the quay to wecome us back?'
Oh how The Scribe would very much like to be on the dockside to catch their lines and offer them a chilled beer and hearty congratulations. Sadly, it is not to be - despite The Kipper's best efforts to convince her.
At 08:30 hrs, this arrived...
With the caption....'He had to do it, no trunks!!'
Yes indeed folks, Steve can be seen waving a little pair of red speedos in the air. I must say that Little Bobbie D looks like he is properly enjoying himself in this picture. Or maybe he is screaming having just realised that the gentleman next to him is now swimming naked.
The Kipper confirmed that they were indeed Speedos and The Scribe insisted that she had only ever seen a couple of chaps carry off the speedo look - one was a nice toned and bronzed gentleman from Italy and the other an equally nice toned and bronzed gentleman in Croatia...oh, and Daniel Craig - so, unless you are nice, toned, bronzed and a gentleman and you happen to be in either Italy or Croatia or you're James Bond - then step away from the speedos!!!
Steve felt the need to clarify the following:
'What trunks! It's a red flag for good reason, just happened to be made by speedo! Waved ahead of hazardous objects. At least we got the chance to get a swim'.
The Sribe pointed out that it wasn't nice of Steve to refer to Little Bobbie D as a 'hazardous object'
Somehow the conversation deteriorated from there...I won't bore you...
Little Bobbie D put forward the following:
'A most invigorating interlude. I wish Steve had warned me so I could have looked down as I surfaced'
I'm sure had this happened in UK waters, there would be a crime report in existence for indecent exposure and he'd be half way to a certain register that shall not be named. Little Bobbie D was offered the services of a counsellor and The Scribe kindly offered to conduct his ABE interview. He confirmed that as an ex-dog handler he has absolutely no idea what an ABE is and he just wishes to put the whole sorry tale behind him and move on with his life.
(For those who might on the off chance be reading this and who like Bobbie D have no idea what an ABE is...I'm not telling..)
The Kipper went in for his first dip in the Mediterranean Sea and confirmed that he left his trunks firmly velcroed to his bottom. He describes the sea as being warm, clean, clear and wonderful.
Thanks for that...I'm off to find another fleece because as yet, summer hasn't actually arrived here in the UK.
By 19:17 hrs, it was clear that the excertions of the day had worn the poor dears out and they had retired to the cockpit to relax before dinner.
Entitled, 'Sitting in the cockpit with a sundowner waiting for Little Bobbie D to cook dinner'
They clearly had a good time on this anchorage because by 22:43 hrs The Kipper reported that he was shabby, tired and emotional. The update was followed by this:
'For the blog, at Steve's insistence anchored at Espalmadore, I now know why! He's been glued to the binos all day looking at the young girls... wearing, well, next to nothing and in a lot of cases absolutely nothing. I did object that he was wearing the binos out but was over ruled 2 to 1!!
Immediate observations and thoughts...
He's single so where's the harm in it...
He'll probably go blind...
Pervert!!!
Anyhoo, they all seem to be enjoying themselves... more to follow...
Saturday 28th July '12
The Kipper and the crew-of-two arrived in Torrevieja safe and sound and by 20:35 hrs they were out and about enjoying the sights and sounds:
'Out in Torrevieja on a Saturday night, tapas for dinner, very Spanish. Pity about the clientele: Manchester, Liverpool, Birmingham accents everywhere! Checked the bilge today as every day was full of water, 8 gallons! We have a leak! Stern gland and keel bolts checked - one appeared to be weepig, further inestigation...no it isn't. Then discovered the toilet inlet pipe what was replaced by lurverly Pete the tank man was leaking. A job to do tomorrow before we can put to sea. Thought I may have to lift out and have a new seacock fitted...phew!'
Phew indeed; that would have been extremely costly.
May I take this opportunity to apologise to our friends from the North of our fair land - you all have lovely accents, clearly The Kipper doesn't appreciate your melodious tones.
Sunday 29th July 12 - The Kipper udpated as follows:
'Up early, before the heat of the day, 06:30 hrs and repaired the split pipe, all done by 08:00. Cleaning up, hope to be away by 10:00 hrs for Ibiza. Yippee, moving on again.'
After a little prompting from The Scribe, he provided the following information:
'It's about 120 miles direct but we have an easterly so will be going North then as the wind veers will then go east. Probably end up doing 140. 24 hours or so to get there.'
'Out in Torrevieja on a Saturday night, tapas for dinner, very Spanish. Pity about the clientele: Manchester, Liverpool, Birmingham accents everywhere! Checked the bilge today as every day was full of water, 8 gallons! We have a leak! Stern gland and keel bolts checked - one appeared to be weepig, further inestigation...no it isn't. Then discovered the toilet inlet pipe what was replaced by lurverly Pete the tank man was leaking. A job to do tomorrow before we can put to sea. Thought I may have to lift out and have a new seacock fitted...phew!'
Phew indeed; that would have been extremely costly.
 |
| Pete the Tank Man |
May I take this opportunity to apologise to our friends from the North of our fair land - you all have lovely accents, clearly The Kipper doesn't appreciate your melodious tones.
Sunday 29th July 12 - The Kipper udpated as follows:
'Up early, before the heat of the day, 06:30 hrs and repaired the split pipe, all done by 08:00. Cleaning up, hope to be away by 10:00 hrs for Ibiza. Yippee, moving on again.'
After a little prompting from The Scribe, he provided the following information:
'It's about 120 miles direct but we have an easterly so will be going North then as the wind veers will then go east. Probably end up doing 140. 24 hours or so to get there.'
Saturday, 28 July 2012
Thursday 26th July '12
At 09:51 hrs The Kipper updated us as follows:
'Morning, having motored all night in a very light westerly wind (draught more than wind) we are now about 30 miles from Almeria. We are considering keeping going to Torrevieja (another 24 hours from this eveninng). We could then meet up with Dano and Viv (aka Alan & Vivien). Will keep you posted.'
Given the report of the light wind conditions, The Sribe enquired if the nasty, scheming, vicious little sail had been given it's freedom. The report at 15:04 hrs was as follows:
'That recalcitrant sail has been kept safely buttoned up in the forepeak. Had a couple of problems during the night, the engine almost died, appeared to be cured after I bled the system. It died again at lunchtime and wouldn't clear so sailed into Puerto de Aguadulce. On the approach to the harbour tried the engine, it started and ran correctly. Will change all filters on oil and try again. A frustrated Kipper.'
The Kipper sent this picture of the windscoop working it's magic - present from The Scribe prior to leaving the UK
By 20:16 hrs, The Kipper wrote:
'Job done with able assistance from the crew-of-two. Engine restarted first time and sounded like an engine should! See what tomorrow can throw at us!'
By 20:19 hrs it seemed things had changed...
'Will be working on fuel system changing filters this evening, keeping fingers crossed it all works. Will have a 24 hour run up to Torrevieca to try it out.'
At 18:37 hrs on Friday 27th July they were well on their way again:
'Left port this morning at 09:30, decided to give the engine a good run before crossing to Ibiza. So the wind decided to blow in our favour for once, had a brilliant sail, maintained 6 - 7 knots all day. Wind has now died off to 8 knots so can now try out the engine. Heading for Torrevieja, should arrive by about 10:00 in the morning.'
At 19:46 hrs, The Kipper wrote:
'Violence has broken out on board...fly killing is back on the agenda! Where do they come from? I know where they go...fly hell!!!'
If anyone reading this might know of a good entomology professor who could help with this problem, could you put them in touch with The Kipper. Thank you kindly.
That was the last update from The Kipper and the crew-of-two, hopefully they should be nearing Ibiza and will soon be ashore exploring the sights and sounds...and no doubt, the bars...
'Morning, having motored all night in a very light westerly wind (draught more than wind) we are now about 30 miles from Almeria. We are considering keeping going to Torrevieja (another 24 hours from this eveninng). We could then meet up with Dano and Viv (aka Alan & Vivien). Will keep you posted.'
Given the report of the light wind conditions, The Sribe enquired if the nasty, scheming, vicious little sail had been given it's freedom. The report at 15:04 hrs was as follows:
'That recalcitrant sail has been kept safely buttoned up in the forepeak. Had a couple of problems during the night, the engine almost died, appeared to be cured after I bled the system. It died again at lunchtime and wouldn't clear so sailed into Puerto de Aguadulce. On the approach to the harbour tried the engine, it started and ran correctly. Will change all filters on oil and try again. A frustrated Kipper.'
By 20:16 hrs, The Kipper wrote:
'Job done with able assistance from the crew-of-two. Engine restarted first time and sounded like an engine should! See what tomorrow can throw at us!'
By 20:19 hrs it seemed things had changed...
'Will be working on fuel system changing filters this evening, keeping fingers crossed it all works. Will have a 24 hour run up to Torrevieca to try it out.'
At 18:37 hrs on Friday 27th July they were well on their way again:
'Left port this morning at 09:30, decided to give the engine a good run before crossing to Ibiza. So the wind decided to blow in our favour for once, had a brilliant sail, maintained 6 - 7 knots all day. Wind has now died off to 8 knots so can now try out the engine. Heading for Torrevieja, should arrive by about 10:00 in the morning.'
At 19:46 hrs, The Kipper wrote:
'Violence has broken out on board...fly killing is back on the agenda! Where do they come from? I know where they go...fly hell!!!'
If anyone reading this might know of a good entomology professor who could help with this problem, could you put them in touch with The Kipper. Thank you kindly.
That was the last update from The Kipper and the crew-of-two, hopefully they should be nearing Ibiza and will soon be ashore exploring the sights and sounds...and no doubt, the bars...
Wednesday, 25 July 2012
Wednesday 25th July '12
19:46 hrs and I have just received a rather disturbing text from Little Bobbie D:
'Scribe. Update on crew injuries. Steve, broken shoulder - 'Release spinnaker pole Kipper...NOT THAT FAST!' Kipper, sore hip carrying 50 litres of water from Morrisons. Steve, knee cartilage from carrying 2cwt of food from Morrisons. Kipper, knee ligaments, falling off lump of 4x2 meant to be boarding ramp. Steve and Kipper, sore thumbs x 4, suburn x 1, sore neck x 2, sprained knee x 1. Mental despair x 2. Fixing grating all bloody weekend and not a word of thanks. Kipper sore finger, pushed a couple of buttons. Anon. PS. Bobbie D ok ish. Little Bobbie D makes me sound like bloody 50's rocker, which clearly I'm not.'
The Scribe has several observations to make.
1) They have been warned on more than one occasion not to let that spinnaker out of the bag but do they heed advice...do they heck as like! Last time it showed it's ugly face on deck, it almost caused a mutiny and now it has managed to take out one of the crew-of-two. Not only that but the sneaky little sail has managed to transfer the blame onto the beleagured Kipper. I await an update on progress although I have a sneaking suspicion in this instance, 'broken shoulder' may be defined as minor graze and a bit of a bruise. I need blood and bone poking through skin before I am overcome with concern.
2) The Scribe wishes she had shares in Morrisons...
3) The Scribe also wishes she had shares in Ralgex, Voltarol surgical knee supports and Valium
4) There is never any excuse for sunburn - deal with it!
5) The Scribe thinks perhaps the author of said text might have had his buttons pushed...
6) Boarding ramp probably fine - no doubt an alcohol induced fall...
and finally, as for the complaint about the tag, 'Little Bobbie D' - a little late to complain about it now don't you think and I couldn't possibly comment about the 50's rocker thing as I am far too young!!
I can only guess from this that they are still in Gibraltar and are probably being measured for bathchairs and having a Stannah stair lift fitted in the companionway.
At 21:15 hrs, The Kipper sent the following update:
'Yes, left Gib this morning on route for Cartegena. I will leave Bobbie D to make up stories for you! Whilst I was away, the crew-of-two worked like proper crew, did the shopping, went to the bar, repaired the cockpit grating (problem job), went to the bar, cleaned the boat, went to the bar. That was about it. Had an admission today, they need a few days to dry out!!! Still, the passage should sort that out. As you know, yesterday did the tourist bit, walked up hill and down dale for miles up and in the Rock.'
At 21:31 hrs, Steve sent the following update:
'Hi Scribe. Got the blog update from The Kipper. He failed to mention the heroic work done by Scabby Crew in his absence! Re-stock. Full clean. Extensive repair to cockpit grate, including battle with epoxy! Not to mention Olympic drinking whilst cheering on Wiggins in The Tour De France!'
One question remains...what on earth did they do to the cockpit grate!!!
Little Bobbie D is now silent which means the other two have either locked him in the forepeak and confiscated his phone or he's sulking because it's too late to change his name. I may have to send Julie out there to take him in hand.
'Scribe. Update on crew injuries. Steve, broken shoulder - 'Release spinnaker pole Kipper...NOT THAT FAST!' Kipper, sore hip carrying 50 litres of water from Morrisons. Steve, knee cartilage from carrying 2cwt of food from Morrisons. Kipper, knee ligaments, falling off lump of 4x2 meant to be boarding ramp. Steve and Kipper, sore thumbs x 4, suburn x 1, sore neck x 2, sprained knee x 1. Mental despair x 2. Fixing grating all bloody weekend and not a word of thanks. Kipper sore finger, pushed a couple of buttons. Anon. PS. Bobbie D ok ish. Little Bobbie D makes me sound like bloody 50's rocker, which clearly I'm not.'
The Scribe has several observations to make.
1) They have been warned on more than one occasion not to let that spinnaker out of the bag but do they heed advice...do they heck as like! Last time it showed it's ugly face on deck, it almost caused a mutiny and now it has managed to take out one of the crew-of-two. Not only that but the sneaky little sail has managed to transfer the blame onto the beleagured Kipper. I await an update on progress although I have a sneaking suspicion in this instance, 'broken shoulder' may be defined as minor graze and a bit of a bruise. I need blood and bone poking through skin before I am overcome with concern.
2) The Scribe wishes she had shares in Morrisons...
3) The Scribe also wishes she had shares in Ralgex, Voltarol surgical knee supports and Valium
4) There is never any excuse for sunburn - deal with it!
5) The Scribe thinks perhaps the author of said text might have had his buttons pushed...
6) Boarding ramp probably fine - no doubt an alcohol induced fall...
and finally, as for the complaint about the tag, 'Little Bobbie D' - a little late to complain about it now don't you think and I couldn't possibly comment about the 50's rocker thing as I am far too young!!
I can only guess from this that they are still in Gibraltar and are probably being measured for bathchairs and having a Stannah stair lift fitted in the companionway.
At 21:15 hrs, The Kipper sent the following update:
'Yes, left Gib this morning on route for Cartegena. I will leave Bobbie D to make up stories for you! Whilst I was away, the crew-of-two worked like proper crew, did the shopping, went to the bar, repaired the cockpit grating (problem job), went to the bar, cleaned the boat, went to the bar. That was about it. Had an admission today, they need a few days to dry out!!! Still, the passage should sort that out. As you know, yesterday did the tourist bit, walked up hill and down dale for miles up and in the Rock.'
At 21:31 hrs, Steve sent the following update:
'Hi Scribe. Got the blog update from The Kipper. He failed to mention the heroic work done by Scabby Crew in his absence! Re-stock. Full clean. Extensive repair to cockpit grate, including battle with epoxy! Not to mention Olympic drinking whilst cheering on Wiggins in The Tour De France!'
One question remains...what on earth did they do to the cockpit grate!!!
Little Bobbie D is now silent which means the other two have either locked him in the forepeak and confiscated his phone or he's sulking because it's too late to change his name. I may have to send Julie out there to take him in hand.
Tuesday, 24 July 2012
Tuesday 24th July '12
When last we met, The Kipper had returned home for the birthday party leaving the crew-of-two to fend for themselves. You will be pleased to hear that The Kipper has now returned to Yacht Petra and has no doubt joined the crew-of-two in the bar.
They have been enjoying the sights in Gibraltar and have sent the following pictures for our entertainment:
A nice picture of the crew-of-two!
This picture was entitled 'Bob with his pensioner friends'. I don't think the gentleman with the walking stick has any intention of letting the suspicious looking man in the blue tee shirt anywhere near his lady friends.
I presume this is a picture of the marina in Gibraltar but I won't swear to it. This picture was very helpfully entitled 'marina next to a runway'. One assumes it must be rather a noisy berth.
They have been enjoying the sights in Gibraltar and have sent the following pictures for our entertainment:
A nice picture of the crew-of-two!
This picture was entitled 'Bob with his pensioner friends'. I don't think the gentleman with the walking stick has any intention of letting the suspicious looking man in the blue tee shirt anywhere near his lady friends. 
A rare opportunity of seeing The Kipper and the crew-of-two in the same shot. Note the sticking tape on the starboard side and midships of little Bobbie D's sunnies. Allegedly broken by The Kipper in a fit of pique but we have no evidence so the Mighty CPS have ruled out any form of prosecution.
I presume this is a picture of the marina in Gibraltar but I won't swear to it. This picture was very helpfully entitled 'marina next to a runway'. One assumes it must be rather a noisy berth.
And finally....just incase anyone had forgotten that this blog is actually about three blokes who have gone sailing...
A picture of the harbour in Rota - at least this one has water and boats in it...
The last update of the evening from The Kipper states that they are leaving in the morning for either Cartegena or Ibiza: the weather will decide.
Sunday, 22 July 2012
Saturday 21st July 12
The cew-of-two have been left on their lonesome in sunny Gibraltar - can anyone else in the class see a potential problem with that?
Sure enough it seems that since The Kipper left they have beenhard at work...down the pub. At 20:31 hrs they sent the following:
'Evening Scribe. Scabby crew here! Shabby night last night. Shopping done this morning then back in the bar by 4 pm. You can tell we are unsupervised!'
I have tasked them to send a picture of one of the famous Gibraltar apes - at least that will mean a long walk to the rock and they will be out in the fresh air for a couple of hours. Unfortunately, they missed the point and it has been suggested that little Bobbie D will be suited up.
I am suddenly reminded of a time when Captain Jack Aubrey RN had to dress up in a bear skin whilst accompanied by his friend naval surgeon Stephen Maturin (fluent in Spanish so naturally Jack had to be the bear) in order to evade escape while crossing Spain.
If you haven't yet read the Patrick O'Brien books may I humbly suggest you go out and buy them; start at the beginning of the set and don't come crying to me if you get totally hooked and can't put them down.
Sure enough it seems that since The Kipper left they have been
'Evening Scribe. Scabby crew here! Shabby night last night. Shopping done this morning then back in the bar by 4 pm. You can tell we are unsupervised!'
I have tasked them to send a picture of one of the famous Gibraltar apes - at least that will mean a long walk to the rock and they will be out in the fresh air for a couple of hours. Unfortunately, they missed the point and it has been suggested that little Bobbie D will be suited up.
I am suddenly reminded of a time when Captain Jack Aubrey RN had to dress up in a bear skin whilst accompanied by his friend naval surgeon Stephen Maturin (fluent in Spanish so naturally Jack had to be the bear) in order to evade escape while crossing Spain.
If you haven't yet read the Patrick O'Brien books may I humbly suggest you go out and buy them; start at the beginning of the set and don't come crying to me if you get totally hooked and can't put them down.
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